Fear is the loud voice is our head that keeps telling us that we can’t do it, we are not strong enough, we are not good enough, we will fail!

Fear will make you stay in a job you hate simply because you don’t want to start all over again. Out of fear of being alone, you will stay stuck in an unhealthy relationship. Fear will drive you into depression because you imagine people will judge or mock you if you share your problems with them. Fear is so powerful it can make you take your own life simply because you can’t think of any other way out.

The question is, what are we really afraid of? You see, you can doubt everything else around you except your own abilities. When fear makes you doubt that you can’t do it, you have already failed. The faith that you have in yourself is enough to make you beat all the odds. Imagine those times in the past everything around you seemed so dark, all you wanted was to disappear from the face of this earth. That you are reading this now, it means you survived. Trust me when I tell you that that is not the last battle you have fought, many will come, bigger and scary ones.

Do not be afraid to quit your job if you don’t like being there anymore. Be bold enough to say enough is enough and leave, then start afresh. You will feel so much better and free. Be bold enough to stand up to that colleague who keep walking over you because they think you are weak. Be bold enough to take charge of your life and stop allowing people to run it for you. Be bold enough to tell yourself, ‘I’m wrong, I made a mistake this time but I can do better’.

When you realize that fear is all in your head, you will also realize that you can overcome it. There is always a way out and yes, it is okay to be afraid sometimes. You are only human. But snap out of it in good time and take back the steering wheels of your life.

A few years ago when I was still new in HR practise and knew nothing about karate, I worked in a certain company with this lady whose sole purpose in this life was to make my life impossible.

She used every opportunity to frustrate my efforts. Nothing I did was good enough. She would shut down any ideas I had even before I could finish the sentence. I was obviously inexperienced, but not stupid. She would shout and threaten me all the time and so I tried as much as possible to stay clear of her. I felt like she was God’s punishment to me for my many sins!

For the next over three months, I put up with the abuse and not once told my boss. But then one afternoon, while having a normal work conversation, as I started to speak, she shut me down and began shouting. She threatened to beat me up but this time, I wasn’t having it. I was done with her immaturity. What ensued in the office afterwards is a story for another day but that was the last time she ever raised her voice at me. And NO, it never got physical. I then reported myself to the boss, lest he hear it from other people. The next time we met as colleagues in a different company, we were besties, she would literally pour tea for me.

Workplace bullying takes many forms, it could be physical, emotional, verbal or sexual. However, being warned, fired, demoted or punished by your employer does not amount to bullying if they are done rightfully and in good faith. It is the job of every employer to provide a conducive working environment for it’s employees. Every company should also have a clear policy on bullying and ensure it is communicated to the staff.

As an employee, you should report every form of bullying to the HR Office and follow up to ensure action is taken. Secondly, you need to learn to speak up, talk to someone you trust about it, confront the bully and make it very clear to them that what they are doing to you is not right. Stand up for yourself because sometimes if you don’t, no one else will.

It is one thing to be respectful but it’s another to allow yourself to be walked all over by others. You need draw the line between what’s acceptable to you and what’s not. Avoid any form of physical violence at the workplace. Respect is earned but sometimes I believe you need to demand it from some people. So be brave and stand up against workplace bullying!!!

Have you ever felt in your career that it’s the right time for a promotion but the promotion doesn’t seem to come even though you have given your employer your all?

When we join an organization, we make projections in as far as career advancement is concerned. One of the reasons why people leave organizations is lack of career growth opportunities. You stay in a company for years doing the same thing until you can literally do your job with your eyes closed. It’s boring and too monotonous.

One of the things people have failed to realize is that there are times your employer has noticed the potential in you, but is waiting for you to see it too. There are other times also when the employee needs to push the employer, just a little bit, towards the right direction. I live by the mantra, ‘if the mountain cannot come to Mohammed, Mohammed must go to the mountain!’

Some Supervisors may not recommend you for a promotion, even though they know you deserve it, simply because they have gotten so used to you doing all the donkey work while they sit back and play Candy Crush, so much so that they can no longer imagine their lives without you. Worse still, we accept you remain there year after year because we want to please them. You see, if your job doesn’t challenge you anymore, it’s time to pack up.

As an employee, know that it’s not a criminal offence to ask for a promotion from your employer when you feel it’s that time. Write a proper formal letter outlining why you think you are fit for that higher position, justify it with your previous achievements and conclude with what you believe you will do if given the opportunity. Hand it over and make follow ups.

Do not ask your boss for a promotion when you are in the bar drinking alcohol. Also note that there are certain instances where the company is genuinely not in a position to afford your promotion, exercise patience, until you can’t. Most importantly, always remember that if you buy your promotion or bribe your way to the top, the thud with which you will crush back down is still warming up for you.

So don’t just sit there and wait for others to notice how good you are in your job or wish you could get promoted, push for it, keep improving yourself.

When the current Nairobi County Governor (before he became one) took out his phone in a public demonstration and called the President of the Republic of Kenya on loud speaker, claiming the president was his good friend, in order to appease some crowd, it left a very bad taste in my mouth.

I have nothing against the Governor really, but I love to analyse issues from a management perspective. You may call it a political move if you like, but I looked at it from a different angle. I felt so embarrassed for the president at that moment. Only God knows where he was or what he was doing when he received that call.

You see, when we are ambushed like that, especially when quick and tough decisions need to be made, we panic. That’s because whatever you say can and may be used against you. You have not thought about it carefully and any public pronouncement especially when you are in a position of authority will be hang around your neck for ever.

As a Manager, it is of absolute importance that you never put your boss on the spotlight like that. It is your job to protect her and her reputation by all means necessary. You always represent your boss/employer within and outside the organization as a Manager. You may have serious concerns or private disagreements with her about operations and so on but when you stand up in public to represent her, you cannot embarrass her by badmouthing her to other people. It speaks very negatively about the kind of person you are.

Sometimes you need to be the bad guy in public so as to protect your boss/employer. You must be able to ‘take the bullet’, not because you are a kiss ass, but because it is part of your job. If you have serious issues regarding how she is doing things and no longer want to be associated with her, quit her and move on but don’t embarrass her in public.

So next time you are in a tight spot and you need to use your boss to help you do some PR for crisis management, call her privately, on the side, explain the situation and then go out and communicate the message. It doesn’t matter if you are best friends or spouses, use that opportunity to be your own person by handling the situation professionally, rather than showing the whole world and your boss how incompetent you are.

One of the most controversial topics at work places has been how employees should dress.

Apart from companies that provide uniforms for their employees, the rest of the staff have always been at liberty to put on whatever they choose. There is no law that states that staff should dress in a certain way to work. Companies though, have always come up with dress code policies to offer clarity in this area.

This is probably for the ladies who at some point have found themselves in situations where they have been accused of indecently dressing. Men on the other hand have used the dressing issue to justify sexual harassment at the work place. I wish to state categorically that there is no justification for sexual harassment towards a male or female staff and any perpetrator should be held accountable.

I will not tell you the best dress code, that’s a personal choice. However, what I believe is that how you dress to work reflects directly on the image you wish to project of yourself as well as the image of the organization. It’s called packaging yourself. People tend to see the outside of you first before they get to know the real you; your inside. It is human nature to judge someone from how they dress, even though most of the time, the reality is always different.

As a HRM, I’m not a ‘morality headmistress’. It is however my job to ensure that the image of the company does not come into disrepute from certain employee conducts.

I’m a huge believer in maintaining a certain image at the workplace, depending on the industry one is working at. It is always said that you should dress according to the occasion. So if you are dressing to work, look like it. Look like the image you are trying to portray. You do not need expensive clothes to look good. You can dress up in your regular outfits and still look great. It is mostly not about what you wear but how you wear it. And don’t forget to put on your most important accessory: confidence.

Simply because you have not gotten what you want doesn’t mean that it’s the end of the world.

I really wanted to join Precious Blood Riruta when I sat for my KCPE. I had heard great things about the school back in the village. I could see myself there, I fantasized about it all the time. When I received my calling letter though, I had not made the cut. I was called to a very good Provincial School back home. I had to make the best out of it.

Then I started thinking of being a journalist and KIMC was my next destination after KCSE. Great journalists at the time had come from there. I can remember scribbling KIMC on my book severally while in class. So when I applied for a Journalism course there, they wouldn’t accept me. I was disappointed and broken so I proceeded to a different college. That’s when I realized I didn’t even like journalism after all. I hated photography classes, the details of how to handle a camera, the lenses sizes etc was just too much for me. Back home on Christmas day, our village photographer would walk around the homes, ask us to line up and count one, two, three and the shot would be taken. I therefore didn’t understand what the hullabaloo was about camera adjustments and all. I majored in something different. I soon found my true passion elsewhere and I’ve never looked back.

The point is, when one door closes on your face, as they say, another opens. The problem is that we spend so much time staring at the closed door we fail to notice the new one that has opened. Sometimes, we do all in our power to break down the closed door just so we can come back in again.

I’m not saying that you should not pursue your dream passionately, you must give it your all, but should it fail to work out, don’t just stop there and organize a pity party. Start over again. It doesn’t matter if you have to start over one hundred times, just keep going until you find that which your heart truly seeks.

We have all been rejected at some point in our lives, but we didn’t die. It really doesn’t matter if at one point in your life, one or two people think you are not good enough at the time; whether professionally or otherwise. Believe in yourself, what you can do and the dreams you have inside of you and keep pushing.

So if you are currently whining and drinking yourself silly over a lost opportunity, it’s time to gather yourself together. Do not let the naysayers get into your head. Run your own race with grace, determination and passion.

Procrastination is a thief of time!

While in high school, I had sought the help of a tutor after I wasn’t improving in mathematics. One afternoon as I walked past the Maths teacher’s office, one of them called me inside and in the presence of his colleagues asked me what I had gotten in the just concluded joint Maths exams. When I told him my marks, he laughed so hard he almost fell of his chair. He then asked me, ‘Ann, you mean your parents have brought you all the way here so you can get 17%?’ I can’t tell you how embarrassed and humiliated I felt but I made a decision to do something as about it.

During tuition, I wasn’t finishing my assignments on time, I always had a reason why. I was making excuse after excuse for not committing. I preferred to read maths, instead of physically calculating the sums. I opted for the scientific calculator, because it was faster instead of the log book, which was actually what I was allowed to use. My tutor was determined though and I did well in the final exam.

Over time, I have realized that when we procrastinate, we begin to make excuses for simple things that we could easily do and get over with. As employees, we often have reasons why we could not properly do our jobs. There is always someone other than us who is responsible for our failure to do things. Then there are those who blame the devil for all their mistakes. The last time an employee accused the devil for his continued mistakes, I demanded that he brings that devil to the meeting because I knew had to confront this devil face to face and resolve the matter for good. He couldn’t find it and we all confirmed what we already knew, he was his own devil.

As a Manager, it is one thing to understand and be patient with your employees and it’s another to put up with bullshit. It is important to bring your Oxdometer to work daily and use it whenever necessary. Oxdometer is the instrument I use to measure bullshit, it helps me weed out the facts from stories. You need to create a culture of accountability. Everyone must be held accountable for their actions. When you keep responding to your staff with, ‘it’s ok’ even though you know that it is not, employees will walk all over your authority.

Accountability requires that you own up to your mistakes and work on correcting them. If someone else is hindering you from doing your job, talk to them about it, speak to someone who can help you, follow up and have the matter resolved instead of waiting for things to blow over before the blame game begins. And most importantly, that line of communication must remain open at all times.

Leadership is the ability to direct the activities of others for in order to achieve the common goal.

Being a leader is not a walk in the park and that’s because human beings are generally difficult to deal with. Leadership requires sacrifice and hardwork. Some leaders are born while others are made. Whichever you are, there are fundamental qualities one must possess in leadership.

As a leader, you must believe in yourself. It is not possible for you to inspire others to believe in themselves if you lack confidence in yourself and your ideas. You must also believe in the team you are leading. You cannot lead people you don’t have confidence in, it’s a waste of time.

You must a person of character. People tend to emulate what they see as opposed to what you tell them. If you are the leader who arrives to work late, after the rest of your team is in, you loose the moral authority to reprimand your junior for lateness. A leader must be able to lead by example. Integrity is fundamental in leadership. Are you the type that is willing to sell her team to the highest bidder?

A leader has a vision. The Holy Bible says, a man without vision is dead. Your vision is where you want to be, while your mission is how you intend to get there. With a clear vision, you are able to guide your team towards that destination as you inspire them to share the same vision with you. You cannot lead people to a destination you do not even know.

You need to have passion. When you perform your duties with passion, it stirs something in the hearts of your team, it gives them hope and the desire to fight for what you believe in. Whenever I watch Pastor Joel Osteen preach, I see the kind of passion the guy has for his job. You can’t help but just love listening to him. And he smiles all the time, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Joel without a smile on his face. The kind of passion my boss has when pitching an idea to a client or addressing staff is enough to make you believe that everything is possible.

A good leader must learn to communicate. You must be able to communicate the vision to the staff in a manner they understand. Sometimes, you will be required to communicate some not so good news. And then there are employees who will do everything possible to make your life impossible. You must be able to communicate with all of them. Any person who constantly shouts at her staff in front of their colleagues is not a leader. You cannot shout at a Supervisor before her juniors and then expect the juniors to respect her and achieve the targets. Communication also requires listening.

For proper leadership to exist, you must learn to inspire your team, be patient with them and guide them. Leadership requires that you become the Captain of the ship.

The moment you are hired in a new company, the first few months of your joining are a huge test and an adjustment period.

Before employment, your employer notifies you of their expectations while you also have the opportunity to share yours. As soon as you sign the contract, the countdown begins. The employer expects changes, some, almost immediately. Then in the process of trying to show our new employer that you really can flex muscle, you start to immediately flip things over.

I have witnessed managers come in and on their first day, employee X has been fired, lunch hours have been readjusted, the attendance register has been moved to their office etc.

A smart manager knows that making drastic changes immediately you join a firm can be disastrous. One of the things I inform any potential employer in an interview is that there will be changes, a lot, but not on day one. Whenever a new manager comes in, empoyees become unsure. They are most likely going to resist you on the first few months. They too have very huge expectations for you, you need to learn to manage them.

When I moved from the private security industry to the hospitality industry, the first few months were a real test of my patience level. The two industries are extremely different. I had to learn to be more patient and understanding.

As a new manager, take time to learn the new company and the employees. Do a lot of observing and less talking. Get to know the people you are working with, beyond the face value. Not everything you are told about someone is always true and things are not usually how they seem. Gain the respect of your new staff, begin to make minor changes and stand by your decisions. Listen to your team, say no or yes when you believe that’s the right answer. Rome was not built in one day.

However, when you come in all bossy, trying to show everyone that a new Sherrif is in town, you may find yourself out of the company before your seat is even warm. Always remember that simply because a style worked in company X does not mean that the same will in company Y. You need to learn your new company and make adjustments as necessary. You will be surprised at the things you can achieve.

A friend of mine recently asked me to help her make a decision as she had received a job offer from another company and was not sure what to do.

Making a decision like the one above especially when you are in another job is not usually easy. I have found myself in that spot severally and I can’t even begin to tell you about the sleepless nights I had, wondering what to do. It is however important to remember that for you to have applied for this other job and attended the interview, there was a reason. Whether to or not to take a new job is dependent on the following factors:

What is your reason for wanting to leave your current employer? Is it working conditions, salary issues, personal/family issues or do you just feel like you need a change?

Secondly, what is the comparison in the new job’s offer versus your current salary? How about the benefits attached to the new job? Money shoul not always be the major factor to consider when making such a decision. The money might be very good but the working conditions are terrible. Choose which one you are willing to compromise on.

Take your time to think about this, if you need to consult more people, please do. If you feel it’s something you need spiritual guidance on, pray about it before making up your mind.

The decision to change jobs can never be made by someone else for you, it personal. Be very careful though, sometimes the grass seems looks very green in your neghbour’s compound only for you to arrive and discover that the water bills have not been paid for a while.